What's the point in all of this feeling I am encouraging you to do? Feeling more, and being present to those feelings, will help you to experience maximum pleasure.
People push themselves to burnout, without having an eye on what they want their life to be like. Men are celebrated for their ability to push through emotional and physical pain. People say, "He's tough!" when he is actually afraid. He's afraid to be real with others. To make himself vulnerable may expose a weakness that may feel dangerous, so we engage in a cycle of closed off self abuse. This abuse of ourselves takes a toll on our bodies, our relationships, the health of family systems, our ability to support our families and living a longer life. To change it up, and reverse the effects of a life on autopilot, we must live more intentionally.
Living intentionally involves having a plan and executing it. It means we know why we are doing the things we are doing and what purpose our actions have in our big-picture plan. Rather than the sleep/wake/shower/work/repeat cycle we can all get caught up in, we can develop a plan that brings more meaning and pleasure to our lives. We can be more aware of people around us and be present to what they mean to us. What a gift that would be...to ourselves and them! When we live in the moment we are able to radiate and express how we feel about others. Our ability to be more present creates a system of peace and calm.
Let's make a plan. Take a piece of paper (or your phone) and write Monday through Friday in the margins. This is your first week of intentional living. What will you do for yourself? What will you do for your health? When will you meditate? Exercise? When will you be available to your family and friends? What will bring you joy? Plan it! What are your your overarching goals for your life and how will your activities of the week support that plan? How do you hope to feel during the week and how will you feel about achieving your goal of being more intentional? Give yourself enough space every day to make a note of the feelings you have every day as you live this intentional life. Do you notice a difference in your perception of the pace of passing time. Repeat this process for every week in the month.
Now look at the next six months. What time can you build into your schedule to be with family and friends? Where can you find the time to be in a contemplative state? Write these times down, and enter them into your calendar. Make them happen. Envision your happiness as you engage in your relationships and enjoy.
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